


Things That I Am Afraid Of

by Denois



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Getting Together, Horror, M/M, Minor Christopher "Chowder" Chow/Caitlin Farmer, Other Background Characters - Freeform, Pining, horror like at least
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-12
Updated: 2020-08-12
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:13:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,845
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25862626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Denois/pseuds/Denois
Summary: When Dex and Nursey moved into a room together their Junior year, Dex discovered Nursey's fear.  A few weeks later, Dex discovered that Nursey had a reason to be scared.There might have been things that slither in the night, but if it meant that Nursey could sleep perturbed, Dex would be the scariest thing in that room.
Relationships: Derek "Nursey" Nurse/William "Dex" Poindexter
Comments: 15
Kudos: 121





	Things That I Am Afraid Of

**Author's Note:**

> Huge thanks to [Draskireis](https://archiveofourown.org/users/draskireis) for the beta read even though there was new content in ffxiv.
> 
> I didn't mean to work on this fic. I have fic that I owe people and a couple of ongoing fic on here that I _meant_ to work on. But this happened and so here it is for you.

Dex discovered Nursey’s fear their Junior year. Somehow, Nursey had kept it hidden for two years. It never came up on roadies and he obviously wasn’t going to volunteer the information without cause. So it never came up until they moved in together. 

“Dibs on top bunk.” Nursey walked into the room and threw his pillow onto the top bunk, ignoring the fact that Dex had already put his pillow there while beginning to unpack. 

“No way. You’ll get up to piss in the night and fall and break your neck.” Dex didn’t bother looking up and continued putting his clothes away. 

“Not going to happen. I don’t get up at night.” 

“Then you’ll get drunk at a kegster and break your neck trying to climb up there.” Dex wasn’t _trying_ to fight with Nursey. It was just that he could not think of a situation that involved Nursey having the top bunk and surviving the year without injury. And since he was more than a little invested in Nursey not being injured, he figured it was in everyone’s interest to talk Nursey into the bottom bunk.

"I'll stop drinking at kegsters."

Dex paused and looked up at that statement. He didn't believe Nursey. Not that he thought Nursey was lying to him. It's just, Nursey had spent two years working on getting Shitty's "Booze Wizard" certification and honing his flip cup game with Lardo and Holster. And it's not like drinking was a personality trait for Nursey. He just liked to cut loose and not worry about things sometimes. Which was fine except that he already had a tenuous relationship with gravity and it got worse when he'd been drinking. And that tended to increase Dex's worries.

Hence Dex's desire to keep drunk Nursey from trying to climb into a top bunk. 

But why would Nursey give that up just for a bunk?

"No chirps, why do you want the top bunk so bad?"

Nursey stared at him for a long moment, seeming to assess him. "No chirps?"

"None."

Nursey finally looked away and started rearranging books that he'd just shelved. "Look, I know they're not real or whatever. I've talked to my therapist and stuff. But it still freaks me out and then I can't sleep."

The pause stretched out, but Nursey hadn't actually answered the question, so Dex waited.

"I've got, like, a phobia of monsters under the bed." 

It was said quietly. So quietly that Dex wasn't sure he'd heard correctly.

"You're afraid of monsters under the bed?"

"You said no chirping."

"I'm not. I know. I was just making sure." Dex took a deep breath and blew it out while considering.

Nursey wouldn't have said that if it wasn't true. That much he was sure of. Well, sure, it was possible that Nursey gave that as an excuse to avoid admitting something that he'd be even more embarrassed about, but Dex couldn't think of what that would be. But either way, if Nursey was willing to admit to or claim a fear of monsters under the bed, Dex wasn't going to deny him the top bunk. 

"Fine. But you need to figure out a back up place to sleep if you do get too drunk to climb up there so you don't break your neck." Dex went back to unpacking.

"Aw. You do care, Dexily."

"I just don't want to have to drive you to the hospital." He said the words automatically, because they were expected. Because that's how their friendship worked. Because admitting that he cared out loud would be opening himself up to being hurt. 

Besides, the fact that he cared was obvious a long time ago.

Sixteen days into the fall semester of their Junior year, Dex discovered that Nursey had a reason to be afraid. Not that he thought any of Nursey's other fears were baseless or that Nursey needed a reason to be afraid of something. But "irrational" was part of the definition of a phobia. A reason wasn't necessary and being baseless was expected. So, Dex hadn't expected a reason to exist. 

He still wasn't completely sure it did exist. It was late. The middle of the night. He wasn't sure exactly what time, but he'd been asleep for awhile and Nursey was still snoring softly above him. 

At first, he wasn't certain what had woken him. It was dark and still and he was prepared to roll over and get more sleep when the barest hint of movement caught his eye. In the darkness of the room, something was moving towards the ladder up to the top bunk. It couldn't be Nursey, his soft snores hadn't changed. Whatever it was, it was trying to climb up to Nursey, though. 

Dex didn't really think about his actions. He just reached out and grabbed the figure. Tight.

The figure resisted, but Dex held firm. Whatever it was, the part that Dex had grabbed onto was slightly cool to the touch and angular. Boney maybe. The skin, or whatever, didn't feel like any kind of skin that Dex had felt before, when he tried to place it later. At the time, he just focused on holding the figure in place, stopping it from getting any closer to Nursey. As he did, his eyes grew more accustomed to the thin light filtering through the window, and he could see the rest of the figure trailing away from the ladder and under the bed. 

He pushed the part that he'd grabbed back towards the under bed. Hard. After a few minutes, the figure stopped resisting and slithered back under the bed. The appendage that Dex had grabbed was the last to disappear. He waited to release it until the rest was gone and then stayed ready in case it darted back out.

The figure did not return that night. 

Dex decided that it was probably just a dream. Sleep deprivation from classes and practice and work combined with worry about Nursey had manifested in a dream about some shadowy figure from Nursey's fears. It was a perfectly reasonable and rational explanation. Dex told it to himself until he believed it.

Five days later, the figure returned. Dex awoke in the middle of the night again. He saw the figure more quickly that time, and grabbed and pushed in one motion. The whole ordeal was resolved much faster.

After the fourth time Dex awoke to a shadowy figure emerging from under the bed, he stopped trying to tell himself that it was just a dream or hallucination. It didn't matter, really. Whether the figure was real or a product of his overworked brain, he was still going to do everything he could to keep it far away from Nursey. It helped that the figure quickly gave up the fight and slithered back to wherever it came from, after that first night. After about the seventh or eighth time, Dex didn't even have to actually touch it. As soon as he started moving, it darted back down under the bed. 

He'd checked under the beds, of course. Gotten his good flashlight from his tool box and looked under thoroughly, checking for projectors or trap doors or any way that someone could have been faking a nighttime monster. Any way that...something... could get into the room. There was nothing. They kept the bedroom door locked.

Still, it wasn't every night, rarely even two nights in a row, and he'd apparently scared whatever it was enough that he barely had to do more than wake up for a moment before rolling over and going back to sleep by the time the season started. So it wasn't like he was losing any real amount of sleep over it. But even if he had, he wouldn't have complained.

In some ways, it felt like he slept better when he’d caught the monster. Like he wasn’t _really_ fully asleep until that point, but he could sleep deeper after he knew that Nursey was safe. It was almost a relief then, when the figure showed up more frequently the closer they got to finals. He didn't really think about why that would happen. Maybe it could sense Nursey's stress. Maybe it appeared when Nursey was more tired and less likely to wake up. Maybe it was still a product of his own brain and his mind was trying to help him sleep more soundly because he was more stressed and tired. 

It was reading week before Dex said anything about the situation. He didn't really mean to. It's not that he was keeping it a secret. It just didn't seem like the sort of thing that would be helpful to tell Nursey and he wasn't going to share Nursey's phobias with other people. Besides, he still wasn't completely convinced he wasn't just imagining it.

They were studying together with Chowder and Farmer and were all nearly fried and in need of a break. Which is probably why he didn't think before responding. Probably why Nursey said it in the first place.

"This exam is going to kill me before the monster under my bed has a chance." Nursey dropped his head onto the table with a dull thud.

"Eh, he's a wimp." Dex responded without thinking or looking up from his own notes.  
"Nursey! Dex isn't going to kill you!" Chowder responded at the same time.

Dex looked up and blinked at Chowder. He was gratified to see Farmer staring incredulously in the same direction from the chair to Chowder's side.

"Chris, sweetie, did you just refer to Dex as _the monster under Nursey's bed_?" 

Chowder glanced between them and seemed to blush. "Sorry! I just, assumed that's what Nursey was saying."

Dex shook his head slightly at Chowder. It's not that Chowder was wrong to think that. His bed was under Nursey's. Chowder was right that he wouldn't kill Nursey. And, well, yeah. Nursey probably did think of him as a monster. Still. It wasn't the sort of thing he wanted to hear his best friend exclaim in the middle of the library.

"What?"

When he looked over at Nursey's ragged question, he was surprised that Nursey was staring at him, not at Chowder. Apparently, someone had heard his own response to Nursey's comment.

He lifted a shoulder in a shrug. "He's weak. No problems."

It should have been the end of the discussion. There wasn't really anything to talk about. Nursey never wanted to discuss his fears in public and Dex still had more things to commit to memory. Or if they weren't going to go back to studying, they should have been taking an actual break, with food and rest and hydration. Instead, they continued to be held in a weird half-study space where they weren't on a break but they weren't actually studying.

"You're saying there is for sure a monster under our bed but it's somehow No Problem?" Nursey was gripping the edge of the table hard enough that his fingertips were pale and he seemed to be losing control over the volume of his voice. 

But, it was no problem. Surely, by this point Nursey could trust Dex when he said it was no problem. Dex had been handling it.

Clearly, studying wasn't going to happen again, so he tucked his notes back into the folder and closed it before meeting Nursey's gaze again. "Ayuh. I'm stronger. No problem." 

He turned towards Chowder and Farmer. "I think there's another quesadilla study break today. Do y'all want to check it out? Or pizza again?"

They just stared at him.

"We need to talk about this, Poindexter. You're stronger? WTF?"

Dex turned back to Nursey and shrugged again. "Yeah. I'm stronger. We can talk if you want, but can we do it someplace with food?"

"Uh, maybe you two should talk about this and Chris and I should give you some privacy?"

He raised his eyebrows at Nursey who slowly nodded and started packing up his things. 

They didn't talk again until they were sat at a restaurant. It wasn't a study break like he'd expected, but the booth was somewhat more private and allowed easier conversation. And it wasn't a terribly expensive place. He could probably afford it.

"So." Nursey just stared at him after the server took their orders.

"So," Dex agreed.

"The monster under the bed is real. But you're stronger." 

"Ayuh. That pretty much covers it."

"Please start from the beginning." 

With a sigh, Dex resigned himself to actually saying the words out loud.

"It was a couple of weeks after we moved into the room. I woke up in the middle of the night and there was, something. I don't know what, but something in the darkness, trying to climb the ladder. I grabbed it. I grabbed it and I pushed it back down under the bed and it disappeared and didn't come back." 

Nursey seemed to relax a bit. "So back in September, you thought you woke up and saw something. Okay. Chill. "

Dex nodded. "It didn't come back for five days."

"It came back?" Nursey's eyes widened and his shoulders tensed back up almost immediately.

"Ayuh. I checked under the bed to make sure someone wasn't playing a trick on us. I mean. It's probably just a recurring dream or maybe I hallucinate sometimes from sleep deprivation? It doesn't show up every night, I'm not sure why it does when it does. It seems random. But I don't even have to grab it anymore. I wake up because something is off in the room. I look over and see the form in the darkness. I guess it sees me moving, and it disappears back beneath the bed." 

"And you didn't tell me?"

"Would it have helped? Like I said. It's probably just my own nightmares. I didn't need to add to your fears."

"But what if it wasn't?"

"Then I stopped it. It wasn't getting to you and you were safe and I could sleep knowing that you were safe." He stopped and looked down at his hands. That was the whole thing, wasn't it? He could sleep soundly after feeling like Nursey was safe. Real or a dream, it didn't matter. 

The server arrived with their food before Nursey could respond again. He almost considered asking for it to be boxed up or just getting up and leaving (and regretting the wasted food), but he was hungry and it smelled good. The hunger from a day spent studying outweighed the knots he felt from talking to Nursey.

Apparently, Nursey felt the same because they both took several bites before the conversation resumed. 

"So, you stay up, or wake up, or sleep lightly or whatever, so that you can make sure that _my_ monsters don't get me. Every night all semester?"

At Dex's shrug and nod, Nursey continued. "And it's always my monster. You don't have one." 

Dex started to nod and paused. He couldn't honestly say that. If he did have a monster under his bed, well, there was one sure way to prey on his fears in that room. "As near as I can tell, it's always the same monster, but it's dark and I don't even have to touch it anymore. Every time it tried to move, it was trying to climb up to your bunk." 

They ate in silence for a few minutes after that. 

"When were you going to tell me that you do care, Dexily?"

Dex didn't bother looking up from his food. "Never."

"I'm being serious."

With a sigh and a pang of regret that he probably wouldn't get to finish his meal because he'd need to leave to go pack his things and find a place to stay, Dex set down his flatware and met Nursey's gaze. "I am too. We both know it. _Everyone_ knows it. But saying it would make things awkward and mess up our friendship. So I was never going to say it."

Nursey stared at him, unblinking as his mouth slowly formed into a small o and his eyes widened.

"You _care_ about me."

"Already established." Dex turned and craned his neck to see if he could find a server to flag down for a box and the check.

"Why didn't you say?"

"I just told you why." 

"Dex, what are you doing?" Nursey's hand landed on his and Dex jerked his head back around to stare at it. "Dex? Will?"

He licked his lips and dragged his eyes from Nursey's hand up to his face. 

"Derek?" He knew how soft the name sounded on his lips. There was a reason he always called Nursey by his last name. Anything else and he couldn't stop himself from sounding fond. 

"You really should have said."

"We both knew." 

"We both really really didn't."

* * *

Nursey did not sleep in the top bunk that night. He slept in the bottom bunk, tucked up against the wall with Dex between him and any monsters the world wanted to send.

None appeared. 

They both slept soundly.

**Author's Note:**

> I can be found on tumbls at [SexyDexyNurse](https://sexydexynurse.tumblr.com/) if you want to talk to me about fic there, or sometimes I post art and headcanons and other NurseyDex things (almost always NurseyDex things).
> 
> Title is from [ by Indigo Girls which has a line that actually inspired the idea of the fic. The tone of the fic is probably due to the fact that I was talked into listening to ](https://open.spotify.com/track/4peEqwtnP8CoTZRFkDUqnC?si=BqWpBYMlTSeZC58Eqd9WeA)[The Magnus Archives](http://rustyquill.com/the-magnus-archives/) by Draskireis.


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